Post 3 Feedback

I thought one of the important things in communication as well as listening is feedback.  We don't realize it but we are giving feedback to people even when we aren't listening.  If someone is talking to us and we aren't keeping eye contact that can be feedback to the sender that you are not interested in what they are saying.  The book says that feedback is vital to any group communication because groups use the feedback to help improve on their mistakes.  The chapter also gave guidelines that can help someone make sure they are giving constructive feedback... some of these guidelines are to talk first about yourself and not the other person, provide both positive and negative feedback, and do not be judgemental are just a few of several tips.  This was a very important section of this chapter and I really learned alot.

Selective Attention

Selective listening is one thing that I am very familiar with.  I have the problem of sometimes blocking out certain people when they talk and not hearing anything they say.  I tend to have selective listening when I am being lectured by my parents.  It's not that what they say isn't important, it's more like they repeat themselves so many times that it is easier to just space out when they talk and nod periodically.  This goes with some professors too.  I have a bit of a pet peeve when people say things multiple times or continue to tell the same story over and over again.  I will zone back in and pay attention when I know I think the topic is interesting or has important instructions.  This is a really bad habit and can be very rude.  I don't know if there is much that I can do to change my selective attention with my family except to try to listen carefully to what they say even if I may this it is repetitive or I don't agree with it.  That's the other important thing, I should not shut my attention off just because I may have a different opinion than the other person.  I need to realize that it shows disrespect to my professors if I am in my cell phone texting rather than listening to their lecture... the last thing I want is to seem like a disrespectful student :)

Listening post 1

Listening is one of the most important components of communication, and can definitely be a challenging task for me.  I have definitely been known to zone out during class.  i am physically present and mentally I can be totally checked out.  This can be a problem especially if the professor says something important.  It's like I can hear the noise but I have no idea what he is saying.  There have been many times where I have had to ask a classmate for the information because I wasn't paying attention.  This would go under the phase on selective attention.  If the material seems important and completely relevant to me than I will tune in and take notes.  If the material is really hard to understand or seems to be boring I will not pay as close attention, which as you may know, can have bad consequences.  I enjoyed this chapter and found the information really interesting and really relate able.  Listening is where i can really struggle when communicating and I definitely need to work on it :)

Post #3

One of the most important take aways from chapter 6 was the section on group talk.  I thought it was interesting how it by saying things in a certain way you can have group members treat you in a  different way.  The book says that if you speak with authority and sound sure of what you are saying, then you will probably be named as the group leader.  Group talk is a way to solve problems and i think it is very important for people to express their opinions and be active in the group conversations.  I have had numerous experiences where I have been in groups where one person becomes the leader just because they aren't afraid to speak their opinion.  I tend to be the more quiet and reserved group member, so i usually get left with the "grunt work".  I really thought this chapter had alot of good information, especially when it comes to nonverbal communication.

Post #2 Proxemics vs chronemics

According to the book, proxemics is the study of how we use space when we communicate.  It goes figure to say that "the ways we structure, use, and are affected by space, is an important aspect of our communication"(p103).  Some people are very particular when it comes to their personal space, and don't like it when people are too close for them, especially when you don't know them.  I had a friend visit Spain for a summer.  She said she used public transportation to get around and they would stuff you in so you were practically on top of the person next to you.  Suddenly she realized that someone was trying to reach in her pocket to take her cell phone.  That kind of closeness now makes her very uncomfortable and leery of strangers, ultimately effecting how she comes across in public.  She now keeps to herself when she rides BART or any other transportation, keeping everyone at a distance.

Chronemics is the study of "the use of time" (105).  Many people, especially in a business setting have the expectation that people show up on time and come prepared.  Being late can be viewed as a sign of disrespect, and makes you look bad (especially if you are late to meet a client).  My personal experiences deal with my group of friends.  When ever we make plans to go out, we can almost always say that one of our friends is going to be late.  This really irritates everyone and can put a damper on our night.  There have been times where we couldn't be seated until our entire party had arrived because people we late.  This is definitely one of my biggest pet peeves. 

Ch 6 Post #1

The fifth and sixth principle jumped out to me the most out of the eight.  According to the book, the fifth principle states, "groups operate within the norms and expectations of the culture of which they are a part,"(99).   The book uses the example of how Americans pay attention to time and value being on time to things, and that Latin cultures may not recognize this.  I have a similar example about how Americans are very loud and tend to be very animated when they talk; changes the tone of their voice, uses dramatic hand gestures... All of this could be considered as offensive for someone who is of an Asian background where their culture seems to value quietness as a sign of respect. 

According to the book, the sixth principle states, "the things we notice, our perceptions of nonverbal cues, lead to meaning,"(p100).  A perfect example of this would be lack of eye contact when someone is having a conversation with you, or someone rolling their eyes after you make a comment.  To someone from the U.S , both of these are signs that they are uninterested or  lack of respect for the other person.  Whereas for another culture, not keeping eye contact could be a sign of respect or just the norm for the group.
I really enjoyed this chapter and found it to be very interesting.

Post #2 Observer feedback

When you are assigned the task of being the observer for a group, you have a very important task and it needs to be done properly.  This chapter gave very specific guidelines on how to report an observer's findings in a constructive way so that group members can learn and grow from their mistakes.  One of the key things they pointed out was to not use terms like "good job".  People need the feedback to be more specific so that they can understand where the group needs to fix their problems.  It is also important to remember that an observer is also the facilitator, your are meant to help people work diligently and stay on task.  What you report back to the group is meant to enhance the groups work.  There is always a time where someone may be offended by what is reported back to them and may not take constructive criticism well.  The chapter says not to argue with them but remind them that this is your opinion on how well the group is working and not to take everything so personally.  After the observer expresses their findings, they also need to be able to suggest ways to help make the situation better.  An observer has a very important role and can really be beneficial to a group.  In my opinion it should be required that every company uses an outside pair of eyes to evaluate how the group is functioning so that the company can reach it's full potential.  I really thought this chapter was very useful!

Ch14 Post #1

I really enjoyed reading this chapter and it provided me with a great visual idea of how to correctly rate how a group is doing.  This question asks "why use a consultant or an observer?"  In a group environment each person has a different type of work ethic and are each assigned to a different task. Sometimes when everyone is working together it is hard to keep the group focused and on track.  Having someone from outside of the group come in to observe how the group is working together, helps the give realize its strong points and weaker points.  Its like the old saying, sometimes you need a second pair of eyes to see if you missed something.  It may not be obvious to the group members that they are not working together in an effective way to get the job done.  By having someone evaluate their work from the outside and report back to them, it gives them insight on to what needs to be changed so that everyone can stay on task and support each other.  I thought that the chapter made a really good point that the observer should not be someone who is apart of the group,  That member could be biased towards another group member and not report back accurate information.  And if they are responsible for observing what is happening, then they obviously would not be completing any of there work.  I think that an observer is just another tool that helps small groups be successful in completing their work in a professional and orderly manner.